Monthly Archives: March 2015

A work in formation

Farewell discourse, Savior and disciples, walking, talking, traversing, not understanding, preparing,
Unification, many rooms in the Father’s house, Heaven adore, the plenty a splendor, eternity endeavor,
‘I have been with you for so long’, desolation not an option, mortification, accepting commandments, denying desire, failing,
Father, the Holy Spirit, the Word, obedience a haven, resource love, failures fading, a step back forward,
The passion consumes, while presuming nothing, advance slowly, intensely intent, crawling advent,
Do few things, yet do them well, listen, wait, confess, pray profusely, sweat yet not blood, communion, breathe, be still amid a beating heart,
‘Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid’,
Attending mass, attentive, aware,
‘Deliver us, Lord, from every evil, and grant us peace in our day’,
‘In your mercy keep us free from sin and protect us from all anxiety’,
‘As we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ’.

Receiving in the House of God, an unworthy servant blossoms into a friend,
In the world, inevitably disturbed, shaken, wolves in sheep clothing prey, leering, pridefully lusting, circumambulating, hunting while picking fresh meat from their teeth, yearning to be, hungry denial,
Needing, false teachers assume power, insincere profession, leading astray, pretense, exercising judgment betrayed, falling snowflakes into the fire, identity lost within damnation, misery adores company,
‘Rise let us go hence’, true teacher prevail, call in a clear voice, winged words in silence, usurp incessant noise, cessation, liberate identity, integrity graced,
Perfection a process, propagate, proliferate, prune the fruit in order to produce, multiply, magnify magnificence, sweet consolation not, a bitter reward,
Stand alone in order to fall, independence generate generational enslavement, movement of wickedness, self-will run riot, dominoes falling, affecting, an island despair produces waves,
Going out, weakness bemoans the need to assert, dependence creates abundant freedom, together a man speaks properly into himself, broadening understanding, decreasing to increase, a prisoner released from confinement,
Rise above the world, abiding in Christ, death and joy to be full, welcoming, inviting time, open, honest, and willing, preserve peace, the smiling heart of a suffering unity,
Friend and foe, charity prevail, the highest perfection, to be hated demands no reciprocation, suffocate wrath, dealing unselfishly, unassuming, natural and pure, simply discreet,
Be strong in unified individuality, proper identity, self-effacing, be a kind pretty face, comprehend, know who Christ is, know who I am, love others, behave, be good, holiness attain, reveal from within,
Abandon appetite attachment to advancing aspiration, banish brilliance, castaway cleverness, ‘A servant is not greater than his master’,
Humility the ultimate tool, the weapon of mass destruction, the annihilating force, the commingling of faith, hope, and charity, be humble, embrace criticism,
No reward, persecution presume, no accolades, adulate suffering, offering woe at the foot of the cross, witness bloody wounds, infuse blood and water,

(To be expanded throughout Holy Week)


Final Discourse meditating

Gospel of John chapter 14

18 “I will not leave you desolate; I will come to you. 19* Yet a little while, and the world will see me no more, but you will see me; because I live, you will live also. 20 In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you.


Reborn sacramentally

“At Christmas he was born a man; today he is reborn sacramentally. Then he was born from the Virgin; today he is born in mystery. When he was born a man, his mother Mary held him close to her heart; when he is born in mystery, God the Father embraces him with his voice when he says: This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased: listen to him. The mother caresses the tender baby on her lap; the Father serves his Son by his loving testimony. The mother holds the child for the Magi to adore; the Father reveals that his Son is to be worshiped by all the nations.” –St Maximus of Turin.


Lacking the slightest affirmative consolation

No victories in the attaining of final victory.  Christ’s passion centers upon defeat, worldly weakness before the might of self-willed determination.  For the nonbeliever, those invested in impermanence, the events of the persecution and crucifixion of Jesus mean nothing.  There is no emotional arousal, never a crisis of conscious.  The depth of the events transpiring before their witnessing pass by them.  Believers overwhelmed by fear, for the most part, flee.  Those brave enough to endure intimately experience sheer horror.  No small victories are garnered.  There is no underlying genius perceptible to the wise.  No moments of reasoning and counsel providing assurance.  Faith is the only solace.  Christ, able to call down legions of angels, easily capable of conquering on a devastating level, acquiesces, complacent to suffer without even a word of protest.  He suffers completely without an ultimate hinting, no whispering affirmations beneath the blood.  There are no sly clever words announcing to followers that ultimate victory is at hand.  No winks behind the backs of those crucifying.  Everything is violently and outrageously real.  Powerlessness grotesquely pronounces itself to the innocent of heart.  The resurrection and ascension remain invisible mysteries to those loving Christ.  Anguish, the experiencing of events unimaginable in terror, establish temporary reality.  Anxiety, the accepting of injustice, overwhelming sadness, assail.  Confident in the majesty of Jesus, events prove devastatingly contradictory to the miracles and healings previously performed.  Confusion rips asunder the minds of the enlightened.  Divine love remains distant during the most crucial of moment upon moment.  No miracle providing worldly vindication will occur.  Obstinate arrogance is granted the right to justify, parading itself as powerful, able to drink the wine of personal satisfaction.  Those confident in self-righteousness feel nothing of doubt or the immensity of injustice being perpetrated.  They interact in a manner of terminal uniqueness, individuals committed to self-acclaimed self-righteousness.  Strong individuals amidst the events of life.  Weakness foreign, surrendering useless.  Those convinced of their own strength see nothing of value in the pathetic cries of the distressed, those loyal to one being taught a lesson for unacceptably challenging the ways of religious convention.  Flippantly, words of condemnation and challenge are voiced by those seeking personal victory, small moments of believing one’s ways are superior.  In reality, at the moment of the turning of eternity, the majority of the witnessing seek only their own short-sighted interest, salvific ignorance prevailing. Those able to intuitively cling to hope through faith in the One they love, know only despair.



Farewell Discourse

Gospel of John Chapter 14

1 “Let not your hearts be troubled; believe * in God, believe also in me. 2* In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? 3 And when I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also. 4 And you know the way where I am going.” * 5* Thomas said to him, “Lord, we do not know where you are going; how can we know the way?” 6* Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but by me. 7 If you had known me, you would have known my Father also; henceforth you know him and have seen him.” 8 Philip said to him, “Lord, show us the Father, and we shall be satisfied.” 9* Jesus said to him, “Have I been with you so long, and yet you do not know me, Philip? He who has seen me has seen the Father; how can you say, ‘Show us the Father? 10 Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father in me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on my own authority; but the Father who dwells in me does his works. 11* Believe me that I am in the Father and the Father in me; or else believe me for the sake of the works themselves. 12 “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I go to the Father. 13* Whatever you ask in my name, I will do it, that the Father may be glorified in the Son; 14 if you ask * anything in my name, I will do it. 15* “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. 16* And I will pray the Father, and he will give you another Counselor, to be with you for ever, 17 even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him; you know him, for he dwells with you, and will be in you.


Habit increasing the small into the insurmountable

…St Bernard writing upon the words of Job: “I am reduced to such an extremity that the very things I had a horror to touch are at present become ordinary food”. “Would you know”, says he, “what power practice or habit has over us? At first a thing will appear to you insupportable; but if you accustom yourself to it, in time it will seem less hard, afterwards you will find it easy, and in the end it will give you no pain at all, but a great deal of joy and delight”; so that you may say with Job–“I now take pleasure in feeding upon those things, which before I had difficulty to touch”. –Fr. Alphonsus Rodriguez ‘The Practice of Christian & Religious Perfection volume I’



Mary darkness experienced

It was a sad thing to hear and see. Oh, it was all endurable as long as I had my Child with me. But when they tore my dead Child from my deadened heart, from my arms embracing Him and from my face pressed against Him, and buried Him, one can hardly imagine how wretched I felt. When it was time to depart, what grief and anguish one saw in me! When they parted me from from my Buried Love, this parting was like death wrestling with my heart. Helpless, I walked supported by the hands of those leading me. I was utterly without consolation. My heart was grieving and longing again for its love. My trust was unbroken. Among all people I alone showed Him complete loyalty and true devotion to the grave.

Dear, gentle lady, this is why all hearts greet you and all tongues praise you, for all the goodness the heart of the Father wanted to give us flowed through your hands. You are the beginning and mediatrix. You shall also be the end. O gentle, pure Mother, remember today that sorrowful parting. Think of the bitter departure you took from your tender Child and help me never to be separated from you or his joyous sight…

–Henry Suso