For the past few hundred years we have been influenced by a spiritual individualism that has had an insidious effect on our proper understanding of what the church is all about. It leads us to imagine God’s reign as an interior reality in the souls of individual believers scattered over the face of the earth. However, it is not as individuals but precisely as a people that the church can be a credible sign of salvation to the rest of the world.

The above quote comes from a book ‘Living the Eucharist’ by Father Paul Bernier. I meet with the priest, I believe retired, Friday regarding the Congregation of the Blessed Sacrament. At this time, I am only able to access samplings of his writing online. Books are ordered. The ideas presented regarding community stir my heart, intellectually satisfying a longing, coalescing with a Pope Francis audiobook. Eyes wide open, attention acute, I sense something in the works, Divine Will acting and ready to advance matters of maturity, adults patient in waiting for appearance. Gathering, a retreat upon the backburner, could a storyteller emerge within the stories of others, sharing, together progressing within a vital and vibrant Church, able to inspire even the bold intelligent minds of millennials, prophesying proper, able to nurture and share the mercy of Christ, the love of a Holy Mother. Ideas tossed about, a self-acclaimed crazy woman, a mother of fourteen children, bursts out with many visions. I am comforted by her chaotic holy spirit. She declares ‘you will become a priest’. I laugh and say, ‘I am too old, past fifty’. She says, ‘I know a man even older who became a priest, and another man who finally married in the church at sixty-one’. I responded, ‘I want to be married. Every day I whine to God about my conviction a wife would properly assist me upon my path of perfection’. Undeterred, the crazy woman continued, ‘Well of course, so did my friend who became a priest. What matters is what God wants’. Whatever, all is good. I look forward to my retreat. The meeting Friday, I attend with only one expectation and that is to encounter an interesting priest, to set the plate for my retreat. I cannot stop them, yet I will not let imaginary creations of perfection dominate my mindscape My religious fantasies easily get out of hand. My heart perched, aching, ready to pounce, I comprehend I am a dreamer.

Community at the Cross