A weekend of films includes two viewings of Ingmar Bergman’s ‘Fanny and Alexander’. The final speech from the far too human Gustav.
Apr092017
Monthly Archives: April 2017
Apr092017
Daily reading reflection
The Lord GOD has given me
A well-trained tongue,
That I might know how to speak to the weary
A word that will rouse them.
Morning after morning
He opens my ear that I may hear;
And I have not rebelled,
Have not turned back.
I gave my back to those who beat me,
My cheeks to those who plucked my beard;
My face I did not shield
From buffets and spitting.
The Lord GOD is my help,
Therefore I am not disgraced;
I have set my face like flint,
Knowing that I shall not be put to shame.
Isaiah 50:4-7
The Truth
I have a tongue that trends towards mischievousness and frivolity.
My tongue wearies far too many, an opinionated swaggering far too often.
Morning after morning, my ears are busy with idleness and self-absorption.
I have spent a lifetime rebelling.
Toward those who beat me, my heart grew bitter.
My cheeks puckered and spat upon those who offended my beard.
My face, I shielded from even those who loved me.
The slightest hint of spittle in my direction caused immense trepidation,
Shaking and shivering with anger and despair.
The LORD GOD is my help.
I have disgraced myself.
To the world, I have presented an over sensitive face, proud and forbearing.
I have been anxious and worried of insignificant shame,
Defensive and offensive in scheming revenge.
Plotting and planning vindication and victory.
Dreaming of glory and success upon my terms.
Fearing abundantly imagined scorn upon my reputation.
I am lost without my LORD GOD.
Apr082017
Allocate
I cannot take you there,
Set apart, dispensation,
Alone, where the reflection is luminescent.
A strange mysterious interior space expanding,
Transfiguration,
A Crucifixion confronted alone,
In the secret recess, the repose of every moment,
Trials and tribulations, smiles and adulation,
In merriment and love you can come along.
Through faith a pause at every instant,
Sharing with simplicity,
Blinded by humility,
Normal in fallibility,
Weak and obedient,
Genuflecting, making the sign of the Cross,
Receiving Communion within the Church,
The sacrifice of Mass,
We can be human together,
In diversity seeking divine unity,
A silent hidden trinity revealed,
Breathing, bleeding, being,
You and I and God,
Walking hand in hand,
On the edge of the sand.
Apr072017
Humility essential further down the path
St John Climachus says, that the devil, who seeks nothing but our destruction, endeavors to set continually our virtues and good actions before our eyes, that so he may make us proud; and that God, on the contrary, who desires only our salvation, gives particular light to his elect, to make them perceive even the least of their imperfections; and hides the favors he bestows on them in such a manner, that often they perceive not when they receive them. All holy writers teache the same doctrine; and Saint Bernard says, “that it is by a particular disposition of the divine goodness which is pleased to keep us humble, that the greater progress one ordinarily makes in perfection the less he thinks he has made; for when any one is arrived at the highest degree of virtue, God permits that something of the perfection of the lowest should yet remain to be acquired, that he may not think he is advanced so far as he is.” (De quat. mod.oran.) Thus the comparison which is made between humility and the sun, is a very just one; for as the stars disappear, and hide themselves before the sun, so when humility shines truly in souls, all other virtues hide themselves before it in such manner, that they who are more humble indeed seem to themselves to have no virtue of all….When Moses came down for Mount Sinai, where he had forty days conversed with God face to face, “his countenance shown so bright, that all the children of Israel,” says the scripture, “behold it, and he alone knew not that his face was shining, because of the conversation he had had with the Lord.” –St Alphonsus Rodriguez ‘The Practice of Christian & Religious Perfection II’
Apr062017
Christ’s words to a friend being formed into a lover
Follow your own road without fearing you’ll lose me. You will find me when you return, even if you’re a thousand years late.
Since your weak and you let life push you around, go wherever it pulls you. Why struggle if you’ll only struggle in vain.
I will be strong for you. I will build a mountain with your failures and sit atop the peak waiting for you.
Don’t worry. The night won’t frighten me and the cold won’t drive me away. There is no winter as cold as my winter, no night as deep as my night. I myself freeze the wind. I myself darken the sky.C
Follow your road. While I wait for you. I will be immovable. Like a boulder. Or better yet. Like a tree (cross) clutching the earth with a savage fury.
‘Absolute Solitude’ Dulce Maria Loynaz
The Eternal Broken Heart
In Jesus, God saves us by becoming so vulnerable that we are able to kill him in a vile and humiliating way. The crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus assure us that God’s offer of friendship will never be withdrawn, no matter what we do. If the cross did not result in a withdrawal of the offer, then nothing we do will lead to a change of God’s heart. We can, however, refuse the offer. Friendship is a mutual relationship, and a person has to accept the offer; he or she cannot be coerced or tricked into it. And any human being’s final refusal of God’s friendship breaks God’s heart. Still, God does not turn away from such a person in anger and rage. God lives eternally with a broken heart. That’s how vulnerable God wants to be. —William A. Barry, SJ, Lenten Meditations
The Presence of God
To be present is to arrive as one is and open up to the other. At this instant, as I arrive here, God is present waiting for me. God always arrives before me, desiring to connect with me even more than my most intimate friend. I take a moment and greet my loving God.
Freedom
I am free…create in me a feeling of awe. Yes, a wonderful feeling of freedom. Thank you, God.
Consciousness
To be conscious about something is to be aware of it. Dear Lord, help me remember that you gave me life. Thank you for the gift of life. Teach me to slow down, to be still and enjoy the pleasures created for me. To be aware of the beauty that surrounds me. The marvel of mountains, the calmness of lakes, the fragility of a flower petal. I need to remember that all these things come from you.
Apr052017
Adoration
Adoration is an external act of the virtue of religion by which we express the honor and reverence due to the divine excellence. Exterior adoration is an expression and an overflow of interior adoration, which is primary, and serves at the same time to arouse and preserve interior adoration. And because God is in all places, we can adore God both internally and externally in all places, although the most proper place is in his temple, because he resides there in a special manner. Moreover, the very atmosphere of a church or chapel helps to withdraw us from the noise and distractions of the world, while many holy objects contained there serve to arouse devotion, and the presence of other worshipers likewise nourishes the spirit of adoration. –Father Jordan Aumann ‘Spiritual Theology’
Apr042017
A Mosaic Ends
I no longer sense unity in my life, said Laurus. I was Arseny, Ustin, Amvrosy, and I have just now become Laurus. My life was lived by four people who do not resemble one another and they have various bodies and various names. What do I have in common with the light-haired little boy from Rukina Quarter? A memory? But the longer I live, the more my reminiscences seem like an invention. I am ceasing to believe them and they thus lack the power to link me to those people who were me at various times. Life resembles a mosaic that scatters into pieces.
Being a mosaic does not necessarily mean scattering into pieces, answered Elder Innokenty. It is only up close that each separate little stone seems not to be connected to the others. There is something more important in each of them, O Laurus: striving for the one who looks from afar. For the one who is capable of seizing all the small stones at once. It is he who gathers them with his gaze. That, O Laurus, is how it is in your life, too. You have dissolved yourself in God. You disrupted the unity of your life, renouncing your name and your very identity. But in the mosaic of your life there is also something that joins all those separate parts: it is an aspiration for Him. They will gather together again in Him.
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