My love and my yearning for home
ignited in the heat of this night
like the sweet fragrance of foreign flowers
fanning the flames of a fierce fervor.

My love and my yearning for Home
and all my fortune and misfortune
now stand like silent stanzas of a song
in the dark mirror of Your mythic gaze.

My love and my yearning for home
have turned away from the noise of this world
and in Your dark eyes
have built a vast, secret throne.

Hermann Hesse. The Seasons of the Soul

No response, no effort, no cleverness,
A breath, an exhalation, a sigh,
Understanding blessed,
Acceptance,
A turn of the head,
Gentle beating of the heart,
Suffering, tribulations, transparency.

Spotlight within darkness,
Lord reveal my self to my self,
Healing,
Opening,
Elevating,
In order to go beyond myself,
Wings of desire,
Alight Holy Spirit,
Kindly,
Gently descending,
Brush the blood from the brow,
Soften the weary heart,
Keep the exhausted mind untainted,
And the aging body chaste,
Embolden the weeping spirit,
Have mercy Lord.

Every morning a rose rots in somebody’s coffin.

Every night God is sold for thirty pieces of silver.

And you complain of betrayal when it bites into your side, of mud when it splatters your face. You! who want to love without darkness and without toil! Pray tell. Is your love greater than a rose? Or is it greater than God?

Fascinated with the reality of being detached,
Fully alive through love and participation,
Unable to recall precise details,
The sting of a two-edged sword relieves back pressure,
Consequences,
Unconsciousness reduced chaotic extreme back feeding,
The headaches emerge less frequent,
The single eye focuses better,
The senses stop tingling,
Engaged the moments have added up over the years,
So much has happened and been thought,
Consternation within faith,
Perturbation within hope,
Desperation within love,
Coalescing and advancing to the hymn of repeated words,
The sound pleasantly numbs,
Healing and effacing,
Echoing out into memories,
Darkness illuminating,
Wave upon wave,
Stone by stone,
The same lines repeated,
The same poem over and over,
The same life within and without,
Detecting not inadequacies,
Removing harsh hierarchies,
Striking out forgives comparisons and competitions,
Faces lost in the crowd,
Tenderly cut away,
Discern yet do not disgrace,
Understanding graces proficient utilization,
It has always been centered in prayer,
To be is to embolden the heart,
Impressionistic learning to love,
Adoring the Master,
It gets easier to look in the mirror, more natural,
Less forcefully directing both eyes to the floor, looking away,
Less postulating improper postures shears less spines,
Breaks fewer backs,
Negates not the will proper,
The nerves relax and release,
The need to shatter dissipates,
Not through morality,
Not through defeat,
Compassion and love,
Gentle and kind the dagger digs deep,
The heart pours forth floods of rich blood,
Deep and dark, red on into black,
Expunging,
Exhaling,
Absolving,
Amending,
Infusion inoculating,
God you mercifully waited so long,
Now understanding You waited so long,
So long,
I tried to tell you stammering in haste,
I was trying to tell You something for so long,
For so long I was trying,
Trying to tell You something,
Spitting, bleeding from the mouth,
Awashed in tears,
I tried to tell You I love you,
Listening You waited,
Providing precious time to speak,
You gracefully and mercifully waited for me to cease,
To reign in the effort,
To get it all out,
A Life,
Wait no longer Lord,
Open me!
I am ready!