There is the law, righteousness, and commandments,
When the law is forsaken….
When righteousness is not enough….
When commandments become hollow….
Inevitability, the passing of time, being human,
There is violence, sin and force,
When violence is spent, anger aflame, a burnt man walking….
When sin does not work, extinguished, moving vanquished and shamed….
When force creates intense internal pain, suffering and tears….
A desire to cease wandering, even in small ways,
There is always my Holy Mother,
Stillness calling,
Love revealing itself smiling, a Holy Spirit,
A resurrected Son exposing eternal wounds,
God remaining unnamed,
Grace.

Extraordinaire perception leads to delusion,
Distortion on into dimension, a disconnect,
It is a sad reality to see too much, impressionistic,
Foraying through the details, lost in the shuffle,
Day in and day out expecting too much, forces of nature,
Clouds hovering, shadows beneath, sun rising and setting, moon reflecting,
Impediment immodest, perceiving in order to achieve,
To be someone, an identity, a task to succeed,
It hurts to accept the simple, impossible deed,
I hurt and I need,
The unromantic uncongested by imagination,
Not roaming the hills, valleys, plateaus, and peaks,
Of one’s mind, cleverness upon millenniums,
Requiem lost in the wind, unheard, shouted down by cluttered noise,
Years, so many dark and descriptive, defining by post-industrial man,
It’s hard to be upon the shoulders of giants, pop culture screams a killing joke,
Immediate past formation, a Bowie knife stabbed by a beetle riding a rolling stone listening to Dylan,
Brutal within the violence while serving iron and wine, relating forsaken thought and vision,
Identifying the worst of one’s self in others, amorous projection, classics emitting,
Lassitude too feel so much, unique in rationalization, moments of clarity, the harm done in glory,
Unknown complications and the subconscious, individual stories and sad eyes staring,
On the eve too long behind the blinds, through time it’s harder to be one’s self, blocking the obvious,
Tattoos, piercings, the grotesque, the extreme, pointing outward, inward smattered by vomit, revelation soiled,
Beauty reposed, beauty is dead, manifestation marauding inhuman, all are effected, all unwelcomed,
Easy to recline into morbid majesty and mistakes, wanting too much, seeing only the urban, missing the rural refrain,
Magnificence professed through excess, cultural decline, a dumbing down into damnation,
Too much, too much, too much, innocence lost in the blink of an eye, eternity never missing a beat.

Beautiful, you sit before the Eucharist,
Open heart, presenting your wounds,
Be not unwise, you are more than a worm,
Nothingness is better than laying one low,
Your faith and your hope and your love,
It is there,
Hearing the silence, creating the silence,
Presenting within austere being,
A shimmering gown of virginal white,
A hood of black hair, Lebanese in distinguished birth,
Stained interiorly, longing not to be touched, tired of the pretense,
Alone, enough is enough,
Feigning away every motion, astute in repose, detecting, dissecting,
Hiding behind strength, hiding behind might, powerful knowing,
Insight and discernment isolated weapons,
You do it so well, so much to provide, time marches on,
Sheltering, shielding, shrewdly,
Reading slow and steady,
I touch your silence,
I embrace your silence,
I touch your emptiness,
I embrace your emptiness,
I touch your fullness,
I embrace your fullness,
I touch your pain,
I embrace your pain,
I touch your rejection,
I embrace your rejection,
I touch your hardness,
I embrace your hardness,
I touch your strength,
I offer you weakness,
I touch your weakness,
I offer you strength,
I feel not your heart,
Knowing only walls,
Breathing, inhalation and exhalation,
Slow dancing,
Viscous and smooth,
Understanding it was not always that way,
Inside there is a place where once was a child,
Inside there is a place where a little girl dreamed,
Inside there is a place where Myron once lived,
Inside there is a place where God alone reigns,
Inside there is a place longing to be lived,
Inside there is a place desiring to be shared,
Inside there is a place that confidence devours,
Inside there is a place that strength knows it should surrender,
Inside there is a place emanating insomnia,
I am not allowed to touch that place,
Restricted, no permission to enter,
I could never touch you, no one will,
No one should fantasize such immense brutality,
The harsh vicious reality of the purity that is,
That was and will always be,
Heaven sent and heaven bound,
Unafraid within loneliness,
I leave alone your mysteries,
I embrace your humanity,
I leave alone knowing you,
I embrace my humanity,
I leave alone your complexities,
I embrace God,
I leave alone your defenses,
I embrace my courage,
I leave alone your secrets,
I embrace your wisdom,
I offer my faith, simple, devoid of too much,
I offer my hope, stripped of fear, lacking demand,
I offer my love, naked of will, uncovered, without dependency,
Disregarding conditions, I will never go away, God wants it that way,
Willing to be hurt, vulnerable, unaccepting rejection, allowing your will,
Permitting, graced by your mission, wounded by your wounds,
I offer a shared love of Mary,
A love for the path of perfection,
A love for the pursuit, trials, failures and victories,
A love for the mercy of salvation,
A love for the life of Jesus,
A love for the crucifixion, the witnessing of Mary, the fellowship of the beloved disciple,
A love for the mission, suffering, and death of a Divine Son and His followers,
A love for the resurrected Christ,
A love for the Universal Church,
A love for daily mass,
A love for the Eucharist,
A love for birth, life, and death,
A love for the immensity, omnipotence, omnipresence of the majestic Father,
A love for light shining within darkness,
God alone shared,
Within a community of believers and nonbelievers,
Identifying a desire for prayer, to move inward, on into stillness,
To know, to traverse, to travel together, without touching hands,
In ugliness, without shame, to be and to have,
Another together, hearts beating as one,
Natural conditions, worldly lives,
Within congestive heart failure,
Wait, patience, listen,
Death knocks upon the door,
Feel your heartbeat, know yourself,
Know the sound of your heart, feel its power, know yourself,
Comprehending, understanding, sympathetic, alone with God,
Trusting in a new way the awareness,
No other worldly sound possesses such majesty,
Your heartbeat hurts,
For me alone, it is a miracle, precious to be cherished above all worldly things,
As Myron’s heart never stops beating for you,
Your’s will never stop beating for me,
It is authentic, genuine, and true,
For me alone, your heartbeats in wonder, alive within God’s love,
A fantasy while alone with God, within a pursuit of perfection,
Being alive amidst creation, all is good, unlocked within the thought of you,
Permit, allow, open, grant permission to a return in kindness.
I desire to be a pleasant, comforting thought for you,
Simple and true, let yourself be, let me be, let everything be,
Alone together with God.

Last name a figure of imagination,
A foreign man in an old hat and wool overcoat,
A gentleman from days gone past,
A black and white photograph reminds,
An appearance resemblance,
Loneliness apart of being set apart,
Something about you always made me want to cry,
I liked the feeling, growing warm every time,
That oversized four-door lumbered down our drive,
A De Soto, foreign to time in every regard,
Manuel, European pronunciation dignified,
Man well,
Distinguished, intelligent beyond words,
Things were said about you,
Behind closed doors,
Behind your back,
I never understood my mother’s wrath,
A poet, a rebel, a dreamer, an irresponsible crazy man, a drinker,
Our Holy Mother, I recall you loved,
A statue held in a way I never saw others adore,
You knew how to love,
A presence and knowing within every breath,
A reticent silence held tight in embrace,
You knew something others did not,
And therefore said nothing,
You sat and spoke with adults yet were always alone,
Others could not reach you,
You played different games,
Authentic, genuine, sincere,
Porch sitting, you spent time with me alone,
Did you sense my captivation?
Did you comprehend how enamored I was?
Were we brothers of a kind?
I never understood being nothing special as a child,
Yet you would find me worth knowing,
Sitting upon the steps saying nothing,
Your arm around my shoulder,
A lack of words penetrated deeply,
Soul stirring, inviting,
I cannot even recall what we spoke about,
Children’s songs chiming, sounding a call for treats,
Buying ice cream from an ice cream truck,
Did you know I possessed a secret fascination?
Thoughts running in my head when we sat alone,
I would wonder, imagine, clearly focusing upon fantasy,
Your story?
Your pain and suffering?
Your loves and joys?
I knew you were a Spanish Armada sailor,
Jumping from a war ship put out to sea,
Swimming to the shore of a new land,
An exile in New York City,
Arrested, seeking asylum,
What an adventure,
An artistic rebel, a spiritual man of rejection,
An operatic soprano swimming,
What were you thinking as you swam away?
What made you so brave?
A grand eternal escaping,
Where was your family?
Where was your poetry?
Unspoken words remained,
Dancing upon the mind of a boy wandering afar,
I wanted to know you,
My mother did not like you,
My father invited,
Why did she oppose a fellow countryman?
Why did she raise her voice at the sound of your name?
Then one day, growing older,
I realized you were gone, visits ceasing,
Imploring, I mentioned your name,
Revealing, I missed your De Soto,
Angrily responding, my mother told me to forget you,
Demanding clarity: you were crazy,
You were no good,
Goodness was all I sensed within you,
A longing, a yearning, an opening,
Something was wrong,
Something was beating upon the other side,
The light from the sun reflects upon the moon,
Years passing the sound of your name,
Your death, a funeral, my father speaking,
I knew tears, crying wanting to see you,
Needing to be alone,
I worried no one would come to your burial,
I knew you were alone,
A life apart, death imparts realities,
A first turning, seeking my Holy Mother,
Praying, Mary please, Mary please, Mary please,
Be with Manuel, he is alone,
I felt helpless, needing to do something,
Childhood dying, Mary please,
He loved you like no other I know,
Misunderstood, he is a poet, a man weary from life,
Help a dreamer wake to eternal life,
Mary please know his heart,
Be with him in death.