…it seems that we are never to cease being novices; our profession is deferred so long, that almost our whole life, passes in a noviceship and probation before the society (Jesuits) admits and acknowledges us to be true and fit workmen in the vineyard of our Lord.  It does this because the matter in question is the conferring upon us what is of the greatest importance in the world; and therefore it is necessary to have a good trial beforehand, to see what we are and what we are capable of.  The thing in question is, to charge us, not only with the conversion, but with the perfection also, of our neighbor; and therefore it is necessary we should first have laboured very well for our own.  Hence it is easily seen how much those are deceived who seem to think these probations too long or even useless, and who, from the first ray of light they receive in prayer—from the least spark of piety they feel in their heart—would on a sudden thrust themselves into the offices of preaching and hearing confessions.  St Ephraim deplores this abuse, and says it is a sentiment that springs, not from the spirit of God, but from the spirit of presumption and pride.  “They would begin,” says he, “to teach before they know anything themselves.  They would intrude themselves to give laws and rules to others, before they have learned the laws and rules themselves; they would take upon them to give their opinions in everything; before they have begun to spell; and before they are capable of receiving correction, they take upon them to correct others”. –St Alphonsus Rodriguez ‘The Practice of Christian & Religious Perfection III’

St Alphonsus Rodriguez, a man who endured much, including failure and heartbreak, before settling into the life of a religious, espouses upon the importance of patience in regards to religious formation.  The patience and fortitude to allow an inner transformation, an imitation of Christ bringing into being a divine unification, to create within my life a man worthy of carrying the message of Christ.  At this time, I am exactly where I need to be.  I am exactly who I am.  However, I am also open to the possibility of change, new and improved ways to strengthen the natural in order to serve God greater.  Holding decisions lightly, discerning within patience, counsel, and prayer, I am able to explore opportunities for a greater future, allowing the process of their coming into being the time to profoundly develop.  I am not in a hurry, nor forcing free will upon life.  I am not inflicting discontent, confusion, and chaotic ways upon others. Through a lack of proper formation, I am not bewildering, and possibly harming, others.  In a world of confusion, I do not spread confusion.  In a selfish broken world of individuals striving for ascendency, a world dominated by individuals desperate to establish identity, a world overwhelming in opinions, I become a humble man of depth, comfortable within my own skin, expressing above all things faith, hope, and charity.  My aspirations, insecurities, hopes, desires do not shape my disposition.  I strive to remain calm, prayerful, at peace with myself and God at all times.  My dedication to faith, hope, and charity does not seek solace through the tongue.  A reputation amongst others does not delight my fancy.  Boredom does not subdue me into shallowness, curious and wanton in interest and activity, the constant pursuit of secular entertainment.  I am not all over the place trying to be all things for all people.  I do not see myself as a charismatic blossoming personality—a person always selling himself.  In the above passage from St Alphonsus Rodriguez, he wrote shortly beforehand of the importance of a religious community concentrating upon the formation of those recruited, rather than focusing upon the bringing in of new members—quality rather than quantity.  Formation is a slow tedious process, extremely at odds with a fast paced dynamic world of dazzling entertainment, a plethora of stimulating ideas, an endless possibility of worldly and spiritual avenues to explore, a multitude of new people to engage and busy ourselves with.  Mature formation dictates that authentic potentialities usurp glittering and astounding possibilities.  At all times, I endeavor to remain quiet and still in nature, reposed before God–singing and playing to the Lord in your hearts–recognizing the presence of God within all things.  In the process becoming virtuous in the core of my being, thus able to act with dignity within my recognized imperfections and strengths, to truly be a messenger of God.