He (St John of the Cross) arrived one night, and our mother (St Teresa of Avila) died on the morrow. It was as though she had been waiting for her beloved son. Over her last days she barely had the strength to fetch her breath. No sooner did she set eyes on him however, than the tension in her features ebbed away and her visage filled with joy. She could not say more than a few words. But what she did say before she breathed her last meant all the world to us. What Fray Juan said to her was also of great beauty. My wife and I, and one or two neighbors who were with us to help her in her hour of death, were all enraptured. When she died, we all fell to weeping with grief. Yet Fray Juan stood very still by her side. And when I looked into his eyes I saw they were dry.

“Why do you not weep, brother?”‘ I said through my tears. “Would it not comfort your soul?

“Why would I weep when I have just seen her going up to Heaven?” he replied.

He was very sure of this. Indeed, the only reason he allowed us to hold a funeral was so as not to give rise to idle talk, for she had no need of one. I was struck by the vision of which he had spoken. And I could not help asking him what Heaven was like.

To this he did not reply, either then or subsequently. He did speak about hell, but of Heaven he would not speak. It was the same with La Madre, who once had a terrifying vision of hell. But of Heaven she would say nothing…..

As I say, neither La Madre nor my brother presumed to speak of Heaven, it being a thing so ineffable that they could find no words for it. And it is said that something of the kind befell Saint Thomas Aquinas. After a lifetime attempting to explain God, he had a vision of God that rendered him so speechless that all he could say about his great work was that it was straw.

Fire of Love: A Historical Novel about Saint John of the Cross by Jose Luis Olaizola