Contemplation

Dec022014

Stormy Prayer

Stormy Steeple

I prayed a communal rosary today, three decades. The devout setting was wonderful; interesting, intelligent, personable brothers and sisters shared in the experience. I felt an aridity, an inability to experience bliss. I know I am making progress.

Dramatics forefront, I at first confronted the dryness with proclamations. I pleaded with my beloved Mother to understand my love and desire to do anything for her. If I could I would rip my heart from my chest and offer it to her. There had to be some tremendous effort I could endure in order to demonstrate my authentic overwhelming love.

A quiet calm prayer voice arose informing me to relax, slow down, be at peace. My abstinence from alcohol meant everything to My Blessed Mother. She loved the effort, finding my sobriety a heroic effort. It moved Her so much she showered graces upon those I loved–those I hurt in my insanity. Other forms of healing, psychological and spiritual, My Mother, the Undoer of Knots, would assist with as long as drunkenness remained rejected. It is the cross I must carry.

“The beginner, influenced by fear, endures with patience the Cross of Christ. The proficient, animated by hope, bears it willingly. He that is perfect in charity embraces it with the ardor of love.”

I recalled my time in the friary, the closing communal rosary at the end of the day. The lights were turned off, candles illuminating statues of Mary and Joseph. A third candle illuminated the domineering chapel crucifix. On special evenings, the candle offered special sight to the exposed Blessed Sacrament. The Franciscan Rosary provided a little bit of heaven. Ecstasy filled, tears at times flowing.

Today, the Rosary intensely embraced amongst others brought no special joy. Peace inducing, nothing extraordinary occurred. I felt it hinted at spiritual maturity.

Photo courtesy of Unlikely Wanderer (Facebook). Unlikely Wanderer website. A photographer whose images I will hopefully and prayerfully be utilizing in the future.

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Dec012014

Adoration. Preparation. The offerings of the little drummer boy.

Unfortunate children! I have punished you and driven you from the Garden of Eden. Now you enter a world of sorrow and trouble that staggers imagination. I want you to know that My love for you will never end. You will meet with tribulation that will embitter you. Out of My heavenly treasure, I give priceless pearls: Tears! When grief overtakes you, when your heart aches, and great anguish grips your soul, then there will fall from your eyes tears. I, your Lord, grace you with tears. Use them wisely for cleansing your soul. Shed with sincerity and authenticity, tears instantly reunite you with My love. –an ancient Jewish legend.

Simple Offerings

Simple Offerings

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Nov282014

An individual amidst the crowd

…And a great crowd followed him and thronged about him.  And there was a woman who had had a flow of blood for twelve years, and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse.  She had heard the reports about Jesus, and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his garment.  For she said, “If I touch even his garments, I shall be made well.”  And immediately the hemorrhage ceased; and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease.  And Jesus, perceiving in himself that power had gone forth from him, immediately turned about in the crowd, and said, “Who touched my garments?”  And his disciples said to him, “You see the crowd pressing around you, and yet you say, ‘Who touched me?’”  And he looked around to see who had done it.  But the woman, knowing what had been done to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before him, and told him the whole truth.  And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease.”  –Mark 5:24-34

 And behold, a woman who had suffered from a hemorrhage for twelve years came up behind him and touched the fringe of his garment; for she said to herself, “If I only touch his garment, I shall be made well.”  Jesus turned, and seeing her he said, “Take heart, daughter; your faith has made you well.” And instantly the woman was made well.  –Matthew 9:20-22

As he went, the people pressed round him.  And a woman who had had a flow of blood for twelve years and had spent all her living upon physicians[a] and could not be healed by any one, came up behind him, and touched the fringe of his garment; and immediately her flow of blood ceased.  And Jesus said, “Who was it that touched me?” When all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the multitudes surround you and press upon you!”  But Jesus said, “Some one touched me; for I perceive that power has gone forth from me.”  And when the woman saw that she was not hidden, she came trembling, and falling down before him declared in the presence of all the people why she had touched him, and how she had been immediately healed.  And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace.”  –Luke 8:42-48

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Nov192014

No to the Supernatural

Interpreted properly, the following quote from Umberto Eco’s ‘Baudolino’ is a funny exhortation on John of the Cross’ warnings regarding the supernatural. The extraordinary experienced must be dismissed, especially by those inclined toward the supernatural.

…when I told my father Galiaudo that I saw Saint Baudolino he hit me on the back thirty times with a stick saying O Lord this had to happen to me, a son who sees things and cant even milk a cow either I bust his head with my stick or I give him to one of those men who visit the fairs making a monky dance. My sainted mother shouted good-for-nothing your the worst, a son who sees saints and my father said its not true he sees saints he’s a worse liar than Judas. He makes things up to get out of working…

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Nov182014

Simplicity

…Do not imagine, then, that our advancement depends on something esoteric and extraordinary. No, all our spiritual progress is measured by the degree of our conformity to the Divine Will.. –St Teresa of Avila.

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