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Unrequited Expression

Sound and vision, harsh realities assailing, dismal moon shadows cast unrepentant, undefined images, the heart,
A harp, Nick Cave play a piano song for me, reverberate sadness, create space within distance, nowhere stand, abstain,
Tell a glaring tale of a starring man wounded walking, debilitating distraction, unable to reach beneath, pluck the cello, pull the trigger, the badlands
The startling totality of dead wanting, longing, hypnotic chord strumming, desiring hollowness, echoed knocking, a grain falling, waving past the nonreflecting, a banjo twang, a toothless grin, a retart incestuous and vain, all things beautiful,
Lord, I want to live a life full, the world a wonder, arms around wrapping, adventure, satiation, a stallion, a thousand drums beating,
Beyond banality, beyond lacking, beyond attracting, beyond detachment, beyond profound expression,
Beyond being right, beyond being wrong, beyond creating, beyond being, emotionally asunder, an intentional blunder, a heart broken,
A kiss of recognition, existential and underground, emotionally capitulating, amiss a mass of intentions gone awry, mistaken identity, the knot tightens,
Capturing it all in a look of resignation unseen by all, false impressions, rejection of rejection, a palpable negation, identity tossed aside,
Silently and still, efficacious, waiting upon my Man,
An aftermath, vast experiencing, knowing not needing to conceive, finality, darkness, concluding discourse, finishing fate,
My Man paining upon a cross, forgiving all cost, pierced, flooding blood and water, holy wine, holy water,
He saunters past undetected, striding, standing beyond seven feet tall, nose to the wind, focus afar, breathing slow, sackcloth and ashes,
Listen, He approaches,
Divine mercy, He loves,
Resurrected, assumption, sitting He waits,
The Eucharist.

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Stern guidance

By nature the soul is inclined toward harmful pleasure. And so I cover its path with thorns. I fill all the gaps with adversity, whether it likes it or not, so that it not escape me. I strew all its path with suffering so that it cannot take one step to pursue it’s heart’s desire except in the heights of my divine nature. –Henry Suso ‘Little Book of Eternal Wisdom’

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Perfection discipline, practice greater

St Dorotheus says, that nothing so much helps us to advance in virtue, and to acquire peace and tranquility of mind, as the opposing and resisting of our own will… ‘You are going somewhere…and you have a great mind to turn about and look at something on the way; overcome your curiosity, and do not look at it. You are in conversation—something occurs to your mind, and you think that the saying of it would make you pass for a wit; let it alone, say nothing… By chance you cast your eyes upon something brought into the house that is new, and you wish to know who brought it; ask not who did so. You see a stranger enter—curiosity urges you to know who he is, whence he comes, whither he goes, and for what business; mortify yourself by making no inquiry after him’….this exercise very much helps to produce a habit of mortifying our will; because if we accustom ourselves to renounce it in these small things, we shall the sooner be able to deprive ourselves of greater. –St Alphonsus Rodriguez ‘Christian Perfection’

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Dead Flowers

On the purgative path, we must try not to pay attention to either sensual or spiritual delights. Any inordinate attachment blocks the road to higher state of happiness for which we are destined.  Sensory goods, enjoyed outside of God, are like flowers that bloom and whither with every passing season.  There is no reason to pay heed to any of these unstable blooms if they “detain (us) from seeking (out) Love in the mountain and riversides of virtues and trials”   (Ascent of Mount Carmel)

–Susan Muto ‘Deep into the Thicket’

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The Spiritual Canticle

THE BRIDE

Ah, who has the power to heal me?
now wholly surrender yourself!
Do not send me
any more messengers,
they cannot tell me what I must hear.

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Acceptance: Strife of Life

…he  has placed his confidence in God alone and has accepted in advance all that his good Master may be pleased to ordain.  This obviously is not the peace of paradise, but it is the most perfect peace possible here below.  God does not will that we should enjoy absolute repose here on earth or enduring happiness.  We cannot avoid tribulation.  The cross will pursue us wherever we go. –Abbot Vital Lehodey.

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Grace

Such also is the thought of St Teresa. In her ‘Interior Castle’ she teaches that “all our desires, all our meditations, all our tears, all the efforts we can make (in order to raise ourselves to supernatural quietude), are useless; God alone gives this heavenly water to whom He pleases; often He gives it just when we least think of it.” However, she requires as an indispensable disposition “humility, humility, since it is by this virtue that Our Lord allows Himself to be overcome, and is induced to grant all our desires…Let a soul be humble and detached from everything, in very truth, however, and not merely in imagination which often deceives, and the Divine Master, I have no doubt, will grant her not only this grace, but even many others surpassing all her desires.” –Abbot Vital Lehodeyvital_lehodey_tit_1

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