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Jul202015

Freedom into obedient openness

St Francis de Sales on aligning with Divine Will, in respect to the freedom sweetly offered through the following of Christ, the opening of the heart of a Catholic man or woman to the necessary flexibility to unify with God’s will.  Rigidity, hardheadedness, or haphazard, flighty, efforts will not suffice.  The quotes moves forward from the freedom the previous St Francis de Sales quote established.

This freedom (of the Children of God) has two opposite vices: instability and constraint or, in the extreme dissoluteness and slavishness.  Instability is a kind of excessive freedom which makes us want to change our practices or our state in life for no good reason or without knowing if to do so is God’s will.  The least pretext is enough to make us change a practice, a plan, a rule; for the filmiest excuse we give up a rule or a good custom; it becomes like an orchard open on all sides, where the fruit is not for the owner but for all who pass.

Am I really pursuing God to satisfy my whims and boredom in life?  Do I use faith to suit my fickle interests and desires? In truth, am I really doing whatever I want, doing everything to suit me?

Constraint or slavishness is a certain lack of freedom that causes the soul to be unduly anxious or angry when it cannot carry out what it had intended to do, even though it could now do something better. 

My daily spiritual exercise is the attendance of mass and Eucharistic adoration at St Paul’s.  It is a demand, yet flexibility exist.  If I break my leg.  I must tend to my broken leg, missing mass and adoration without anxiety.  I may feel sorrow, yet not stress out about the matter.  If my work schedules me for first shift, I am obedient to work, again missing mass with no consternation, altering plans to attend an evening mass.  Doing something better is a more difficult discernment.  I place a session with Dr. Nichta in that category, again altering plans so an earlier mass obliges.  I would also consider involvement with the Blessed Sacrament Congregation, or such properly discerned efforts within the Church.

St Francis de Sales elaborates.

First of all, I must point out two rules which must be observed if we are not to fail in this matter.  First, we should never neglect our exercises and the common norms of virtue unless to do so appears to be God’s will.  Now the will of God is indicated in two ways: through necessity or charity. 

Necessity is obvious.  The broken leg a suitable example.  Charity needs consideration.

…when we use our freedom for charity’s sake it must be without scandal or injustice.  Example: I am certain I could be more useful somewhere far from my diocese.  I must not use my freedom to follow through with this, for I would give scandal and act unjustly since my obligation is here.  Therefore, it’s a false use of freedom for married women to absent themselves from their husbands without a legitimate reason, under pretext of devotion or charity.  Our freedom must never take us away from our vocation.  On the contrary, it should make us content each with our own calling, knowing that it is God’s will that we remain in it.

This example I cherish as sublime.  Meditate upon it.

…now I want to show you a “sun” that shines more brilliantly than any of these: a really open, detached spirit who holds on to the will of God alone.  I’ve often wondered who was the most mortified of all the saints…after much reflection, I decided it was St John the Baptist.  He went into the desert at the age of five, and was aware that our Savior was born in a place very close by, maybe two or three days’ journey away.  God only knows how much his heart, which had been moved to love his Savior from the time he was still in his mother’s womb, would have wanted to enjoy the Lord’s sweet presence!  Yet, he spent twenty-five years in the desert, without once coming to see Him; then leaving the desert, he went about catechizing without going to visit the Lord, but waited for the Lord to come to him.  Afterward, having baptized Him, he didn’t follow him but stayed behind to do his appointed work.  What mortification!  To be so close to his Savior and not to see Him!  To have Him so near and not to enjoy His presence! (Not to be recognized as an apostle!)  Isn’t this having one’s spirit completely detached, bound to nothing, not even to God, in order to do His will and serve Him; to leave God for God, and to not love God so as to love Him better?  –St Francis de Sales

St Francis de Sales

St Francis de Sales

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Jul072015

First Mass aftermath

My God, I am yours for time and eternity. Teach me to cast myself entirely into the arms of your loving Providence with a lively, unlimited confidence in your compassionate, tender pity. Grant, O most merciful Redeemer, that whatever you ordain or permit may be acceptable to me, take from my heart all painful anxiety; let nothing sadden me but sin, nothing delight me but the hope of coming to the possession of You, my God and my all, in your everlasting kingdom. Amen. –Suscipe of Mother Catherine McAuley, founder of the Sisters of Mercy

Suscipe Latin for receive. Traditionally the word Suscipe is associated with St Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Society of Jesus, as he established his Ignatian Spiritual Exercises. Ignatian formation strives to dispose one’s soul of obstacles, ridding oneself of all disordered attachments. Once exercised, stripped down, complications and impediments removed, an empty soul can properly seek and align itself with Divine Will.

Suscipe of St Ignatius: ‘Receive, O Lord, all my liberty. Take my memory, my understanding, and my entire will. Whatsoever I have or hold, You have given me; I give it all back to You and surrender it wholly to be governed by your will. Give me only your love and your grace, and I am rich enough and ask for nothing more.’ 

Celebrated mass, surprised by the depth of the sanctity. Upon the same grounds as the marvelous retreat center is a retirement home for Sisters of Mercy nuns. The thirty-two females being spiritually directed this week, I believe, are all Sisters of Mercy nuns. Beginning this post is a quote from the founder of the Sisters of Mercy. It is received from a painting posted on the stairwell next to my room. The artwork in the retreat center and the retirement home is incredible. Mass is celebrated in the retirement home. I am allowed to walk through to attend mass. Aside from mass, it is off limits. My room is on the second floor. Across the hall is a large comfortable library. Sisters gather in the library. Directly, beneath my room is a chapel, including a tabernacle hosting the Eucharist. The Eucharist is directly below my room. I must comment on the quietness at Our Lady of the Pines. Interiorly and out of doors, it retains a depth, a prayerfulness and tangibility. I credit the populating religious, consecrated individuals focusing their energy upon spiritual discernment. During lunch, I noticed an elderly gentlemen push his walker through the dining room, exiting the room in order to eat on a patio. Already seated, I gathered my tray and followed him. Through hand signals, he welcomed me, gesturing silence. I deduced from his physical articulation he has taken a vow of silence during his retreat. His appearance and apparel makes me think he is a retired priest from the Youngstown Diocese. Together we sat upon the patio immersed in silence, a bluff in front of us, leeside a small pine forest descending to lower ground, walking paths waiting for exploration.

Back to mass, seated amongst approximately sixty religious, I felt tremendous stress. Nothing to do with them or the location. It was all about me. Concentrating upon my personal life, my experiences: past, present, and future, how could I not be filled with awful stress, anxiety and worry. I must be who I am. Brutal honesty is necessary for proper growth. Right now it is pouring down rain. Rain shellacking, I sit next to the large bay windows, rain obstructing the view of all three windows. It is appropriate. I have been attending mass at St Paul’s Shrine daily, mass and adoration, feeling the power and presence of my effort. However, it was not until mass at St Bernadine’s chapel here at Our Lady of the Pines retreat did I comprehend how much stress, anxiety; disordered emotion, thoughts, memories, and overall state of direst fills me. I could barely hold back tears, and in fact several fell out. I had to distract my mind from a younger sister’s voice directly behind me. To absorb and immerse myself within its beauty would have completely unraveled me. Two thoughts fixated during mass. Yesterday the saint of the day was St Maria Goretti. During his homily Father Phil told of Allessandro Serenelli, the man she forgave, sitting next to her mother during her canonization. The rapist and murderer of the little saint sat next to her mother during her official recognition as a saint. It may be extreme, overly dramatic, yet I identified with Allessandro at mass today. The second thought touches upon the Old Testament reading: Jacob wrestling with God, attaining a new name through the tussle, becoming Israeli, a Patriarch of God’s chosen people. The priest told of a conversation with a rabbi. The Rabbi said, ‘Christians talk of loving God. Jews talk of wrestling with God’.

Venerable Mother Catherine McAuley

Venerable Mother Catherine McAuley

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