Friday Adoration

Maturity on a grand scale tonight, an evening of piercing adoration. I returned to St Andrews Benedictine Abbey for a Friday evening weekly Eucharistic exposition. It is a must from here on out when my schedule allows. It appears I will be working first shift on Fridays so all glory goes to God. A brother invited me to the adoration when I toured the abbey as a part of the diocese’s superb concentration upon the consecrated life a month or so back. The experience was much more than anticipated. Adoration starts at seven with the entire community gathered. I missed the opening prayers, although I was summoned into the presence of the silent community, seating myself alone amongst the empty congregational chairs. I thought it would be a public service. I was alone seated. The intimacy of the moment humbled, making me feel small. Before taking my seat, I knelt before the Eucharist, head bowed, hands held forward in praise, the community and a handful of discerning younger men holding silence. A cough and unseen yet heard movement, moved me into my chair, Rosary beads wrapped around my hand, no Rosary was prayed, awed silence my offering. There is something pungently tangible amidst a religious community in silent prayer before the Eucharist–a presence to behold. St Andrew’s community is something special. The communal Holy Hour ended with an uplifting song of praise, Salve Regina sung as the religious men rose from the choir stalls standing together in harmony with words of wonder for Our Blessed Holy Mother—exactly as we ended our evening Holy Hour at the friary. Underneath everything was the awareness of a Benedictine community in North Dakota. After the community and their discerning guest dispersed, a single brother (possibly a Father) remained. I lingered, now praying a silent Rosary, sitting content with an unknown, barely visible, brother for the hour.

Driving to evening mass, I had time to kill so I decided to explore Dodd’s Camera downtown. I have been intending to buy a camera, and a recent email greatly stirred my interest. The store proved excellent in adventure. A saleswoman edified, while displaying various purchasing options, showing me the exact Nikon DSLR 3300 series my email offered. The staff at the store are friendly and fun, intelligent and approachable. As she educated me, a younger man walked by mentioning there is a pristine used one still in the box she should show me. I would leave with the camera, a 55-200 mm lens, and an amazing used bag all for just over four hundred dollars. I also left with a hunger for an amazing zoom lens, a Tamron B016, 16-300 mm. The speed of the focus while zooming in and out is stunning. It is a must, yet that lens alone cost over six hundred dollars. A tripod is also a must, although I felt Dodd’s were high in price, hovering around two hundred dollars. I am confident I can find an excellent quality tripod online in the hundred dollar range.

Photographic goals ground within the contemplative. I want my own images to become an expression of my interior life and my exploration of the world. My cellphone presents an image from St Andrew Abbey. I admire the presence of circles, perfection symbolized amidst the holy setting.

A minimalist Benedictine house of worship, choir stalls a plenty.

Aug012015

A day of with the Eucharist and St Peter Julian Eymard

Two quotes from St Peter Julian Eymard, and a third from his biography by Father Andre Guitton

“Live on the divine Eucharist, like the Hebrews did on the Manna. Your soul can be entirely dedicated to the divine Eucharist and very holy in the midst of your work and contacts with the world.”

“Keep your soul at peace, in order to be able to be attentive and very faithful to the inner movement of the Holy Spirit.”

“O Raphael, (Archangel) I can remember very clearly that afternoon when I ran out of this room, down the stairs, and out the front door. I ran into the church with all the energy of a five-year-old. It was empty. I did something so out of place. I climbed and sat on the table of the altar and I just leaned my head against the tabernacle. My sister, Marianne, asked me, “What are you doing there?” I quickly answered, ‘I am near Jesus and I’m listening to him.’ Marianne had a difficult time explaining this to our dear mother.”

God is good. The day retreat at St. Paschal Baylon and the Congregation of the Blessed Sacrament proved edifying. Tomorrow morning is the second, calling forth a five AM start of the day. Three mysteries of the Rosary with quality devout fellowship. I am being absolutely blessed with spiritual exercises in abundance. I am mentally exhausted after ten hours of discussions, a Holy Hour, prayers, song, meals, and mass. St Eymard has etched his way into my consciousness. The priest of the Congregation of the Blessed Sacrament are a special bunch of religious men. Conspicuous in his absence, Father Paul Bernier is out of town. Matters were easily made comfortable after attending the cook-out and encountering several people from St Paul’s Shrine.

The Eucharistic retreat was a hallowed time amongst a mature and adolescent crowd. The teens on retreat joined us for several events, including sharing lunch with us and mass. The organizer of the teen retreat had the teens break up and sit within the adult groups. Interspersed amongst the lectures, we would gather in smaller groups of eight to ten. In total, there were six smaller groups. The groups held steady throughout the day, allowing intimacy to develop. Two female teens joined our group. Enthused, the girls provided inspiration and intelligence. I am deeply touched when sharing faith with young people

No more. I read and retire, excited to wake early for excellent fellowship and resounding Rosaries before a favorite statue of Mary. I will take a photo for posting. I find the photo of St Peter Julian Eymard absolutely fascinating. The history of the photographic camera dates back to the 1840’s in regards to substantial technological advancements. I am not sure of the date of the photograph, although St. Eymard passed away in 1868. He would have been alive and active in France during the Lourdes apparitions occurring in 1858 and the papal defining, Pope Pius IX, of Mary as free from sin, the Immaculate Conception, in 1854.

St Peter Julian Eymard

Jul232015

Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring

Jesu, joy of man’s desiring, Holy wisdom, love most bright; Drawn by Thee, our souls aspiring Soar to uncreated light.

Word of God, our flesh that fashioned, With the fire of life impassioned, Striving still to truth unknown, Soaring, dying round Thy throne.

Through the way where hope is guiding, Hark, what peaceful music rings; Where the flock, in Thee confiding, Drink of joy from deathless springs.

Theirs is beauty’s fairest pleasure; Theirs is wisdom’s holiest treasure. Thou dost ever lead Thine own In the love of joys unknown.

This hymn sweeps me away every time it is sung. The words poetically express personal yearnings. Beautifully, succinctly, it praises the majesty of God beyond human understanding. That which can be perceived in the deepest of prayer, quietness and stillness before the Eucharist. That which is hoped for every moment reposed within the presence of God. That which is tasted during the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. That which is touched when our hearts are opened through the acquiescing of pride and free will, holding tightly to the virtues of love and humility. That I hear within the singing of this hymn. The words are from the poet laureate Robert Bridges, centering the words upon the last movement of Bach’s “Heart and Mouth and Deed and Life”.

During meditation before the Eucharist, I felt the desire to stress my interior vision of Christ the majority of time I am quieting myself. It is the resurrected Christ in all of his magnificence, radiant in luminescence, I visualize in prayer. The Divine Mercy Christ, touching his heart, rays of bluish white and red pouring forth. The infant Jesus is recognized at times, the Liturgical season and the Rosary guiding imagery. Yesterday, I posted a video with microscopic images of sperm cells actively swimming about, life striving, passionate to become embodied. Such a delightful mystery to observe. The Holy Spirit within the miracle of life. The splendor enlarges when the realization of the Holy Spirit impregnating the obedient Mary. What a wonder. A Polish priest I knew remarked that there it was, that was the defining moment of mankind. Mary’s fiat, and then within her womb the conceiving of Jesus, One of Three. The Word incarnate. The Divine baby poor in utter simplicity, during the travels of holy common, poor working parents, Saint Joseph and the eventual Queen of Heaven. How could she not become the Queen of Heaven after all of that? The Infant of Prague provides blessing, a testament to my friend Janette in Toledo. Sister Patricia told me, vague on why, or sources, yet she said “James you realize Jesus, eternal in being, was always going to come. God always intended His Divine Incarnation. Before original sin, Jesus was destined for birth, the ultimate grace to mankind”. The teacher Jesus, the man Jesus, the wise, unassuming, kind, compassionate, obedient, insightful, and also passionate when it came to His Father is also an image. The proclamation of the Kingdom of God is the third mystery of the Luminous mysteries. The Beatitudes. Then the most striking, the most penetrating image of Jesus within prayer is the Passion of Christ. The crucifixion propels forward the deepest message of the life of Jesus, the piercing of the heart of Mary. His death defines the greatest. Sister Patricia remarks “His death, His passion and crucifixion was not God’s intent. It was a consequence”. May the blood of Jesus always wash over my heart nurturing love and humility within my disposition.

May312015

Benediction: Corpus Christi

To go beyond formality and tradition, to see the truth and essence of words, thoughts, conceptions, possibilities and the deepest penetrating realities, I find the words of the the Benediction hymns profound, worthy of continual contemplation. Terms to consider: saving victim; immortal Godhead, one in three; native land; down in adoration falling; ancient forms departing; newer rites of grace prevailing; feeble senses fail; faith for all defects supplying; the Trinity beautifully unveiled.

O Saving Victim, opening wide
The gate of Heaven to man below:
Our foes press on from every side,
Thine aid supply, Thy strength bestow.
To Thy great Name be endless praise,
Immortal Godhead, One in Three:
Oh, grant us endless length of days
In our true native land with Thee. Amen.

All heavenly and saintly beings hail the Lord present upon the earth.

Down in adoration falling,
Lo! the sacred Host we hail;
Lo! over ancient forms departing,
Newer rites of grace prevail;
Faith for all defects supplying
Where the feeble senses fail.
To the Everlasting Father,
And the Son Who reigns on high,
With the Spirit Blest proceeding
Forth from Each eternally,
Be salvation, honor, blessing,
Might and endless majesty. Amen.

Thou hast given them Bread from Heaven.
Containing in Itself all delight.

Let us pray (oremus)
O God, Who in this wonderful Sacrament
has left us a memorial of Thy passion,
grant, we implore Thee,
that we may so venerate the sacred mysteries of Thy Body and Blood
as always to be conscious of the fruit of Thy Redemption,
Thou Who livest and reignest forever and ever.
Amen

Old Testament prefiguring. The Mercy Seat, the Monstrance.

May072015

The Knight of God –Henry Suso poetry

“For I will show him how many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.” Acts ix. 16

As the song of him who singeth,
Playing on a harp of gold,
So to me was Christ’s evangel
In the days of old.

Thus across the lake of Constance
Went I forth to preach His Word,
And beside me sat the squire
Of a noble Lord.

None in all the ship so knightly,
None so bravely dight as he-
“Tell me,” I besought, “thine errand
Yonder o’er the sea.”

“I go forth,” he said, “to gather
Many a knight and noble bold;
They shall tilt at joust and tourney,
Whilst fair eyes behold.

“And the bravest and the noblest
He shall win a glorious prize,
Smiles to boot, and courtly favour
In the ladies’ eyes.”

“Tell me what shall be the guerdon?”
“Lo, the fairest in the land
Sets a gold ring on his ﬁnger
With her lily hand.”

“Tell me how the knight may win it?”
“Scars and bruises must he boast,
For the knight shall be the winner
Who endures the most.”

“Tell me, if when ﬁrst assaulted,
He in knightly guise shall stand,
Shall he win the golden guerdon
From his lady’s hand?”

“Nay, right on, till all is over,
Must a worthy knight hold on;
Bear the brunt, and stand a conqueror
When the ﬁght is done.”

“And if he be wounded sorely,
Will he weep and will he mourn?”
“Nay, in place of winning honour,
He would win but scorn.”

Then my spirit sank within me,
And within my heart I spake-
“O my Lord, thus ﬁght the knightly
For their honour’s sake.

“Small the prize, and stern the battle,
Worthless gain, and weary ﬁght-
Lord, a ring of stones most precious
Hast thou for Thy knight!

“Oh, to be the knight of Jesus!
Scorning pain, and shame, and loss;
There the crown, the joy, the glory,
Here, O Lord, Thy Cross.”

Then I wept, with bitter longing
Thus the knight of God to be;
And the Lord, who saw me weeping,
Gave the cross to me.

Bitter pain, and shame, and sorrow
Came upon me as a ﬂood-
I forgot it was the tourney
Of the knights of God.

And again I wept, beseeching,
“Take the Cross, O Lord, from me!”
Till a light broke like the morning
Over the wild sea.

Then there spake the Voice beloved,
Still and sweet my heart within-
“is it thus, O knight of Jesus,
Thou the prize wilt win?”

“O my Lord, the ﬁght is weary-
Weary, and my heart is sore!”
“And,” he answered, “fair the guerdon,
And for evermore.”

“I have shamed Thee, craven-hearted,
I have been Thy recreant knight-
Own me yet, O Lord, albeit
Weeping whilst I ﬁght.”

“Nay,” He said; “yet wilt thou shame Me
Wilt thou shame thy knightly guise?
I would have My angels wonde
At thy gladsome eyes.

“Need’st thou pity, knight of Jesus?-
Pity for thy glorious hest?
On! let God and men and angels
See that thou art blest!

In the middle ages, the knight was the heroic figure men aspired to be in fantasy and deed–a life of bravery and honor. Chivalry demanded a code of ethics–manliness included virtuous conduct and thought, fighting the good fight, speaking words of wisdom, generosity, and kindness. In a world of brutality and wicked tongues, the knight righteously matched violence with violence, cruelty with compassion and intelligence. The defenseless were to be protected, the weak to be venerated, respected and sheltered. A true knight’s every effort was to God and others. In tournaments, the battlefield and life, a knight dedicated his efforts to a chosen damsel. The lady of honor acknowledging his respect by tying a scarf to the knight’s jousting lance or armory. St Francis aspired to be a knight in his younger days, before turning his heroic efforts over to the religious life. His lady of honor became Lady Poverty, captured so lovingly, allegorically, and fantastically in ‘Sacrum commercium Sancti Francisci cum domina Paupertate’ (The Sacred Bond of Saint Francis with Lady Poverty). The idea leads so fittingly into a devotion to Our Holy Mother.

Apr302015

St Catherine of Seina poetry

“Strange that so much suffering is caused because of the misunderstandings of God’s true nature. God’s heart is more gentle than the Virgin’s first kiss upon the Christ. And God’s forgiveness to all, to any thought or act, is more certain than our own being.”

….for what is the mind to do
with something that becomes the mind’s ruin:
a God that consumes us
in His grace….

I see that you have endowed your vicar
by nature
with a fearless heart;
so I humbly, imploringly beg you
to pour the light beyond nature
into the eye of his understanding.
For unless this light,
acquired through pure affection for virtue,
is joined with it,
a heart such as his tends to be proud.

Today again let every selfish love be cut away
from those enemies of yours
and from the vicar
and from us all,
so that we may be able to forgive those enemies
when you bend their hardness.

For them, that they may humble themselves
and obey this lord of ours,
I offer you my life
from this moment
and for whenever you wish me to lay it down
for your glory.

Apr232015

Prayer guidance and inspiration from Suso

Form the suffering of Christ crucified within oneself, His sweet teachings, His gentle conduct, and His pure life, which He led as an example for us to follow, and thus through Him press further within. Afterward, as exterior preoccupations disappear, one should sit in the stillness of one’s spirit in vigorous detachment, as though one is dead to one self, never leading to oneself or being one’s own goal, but having Christ alone and the honor and glory of the heavenly Father as one’s goal. Toward others, both friends and enemies, one should act humbly and friendly.

Now when the spirit, unconscious of itself, really begins to dwell in this transfigured resplendent darkness, it becomes free of all obstacles and all that is its own, as St Bernard says….This losing of self is something divine that somehow becomes all things for him….the spirit withdraws, but not completely. It takes on certain qualities of the Godhead…it does not become God….What happens…happens by grace…something created out of nothing that remains forever…as the soul is taken in, it is freed from doubt as it becomes lost when it is separated from its individuality and is joined to what is divine while being unconscious of itself….the power of resplendent divine being, the spirit is pulled upward beyond its natural capacities into the nakedness of this nothing because it is bare of creatures of any kind….The spirit loses its own knowledge because it loses itself, lacking any awareness of self and forgetting all things. And this happened when the spirit in itself turned away from the created nature of its self and all things toward the naked uncreatedness of nothingness. –Henry Suso

Catholic Contemplative Life

A journey of recovery within Christ and His Church

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